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Okay, sure, St. Patrick’s Day may not be the first holiday one associates with darklings. The loud crowds of frat boys out chugging cheap beer in “Kiss Me, I’m Irish” shirts don’t exactly blend with our aesthetic, you know? But we think we can claim at least one small corner of this holiday the only way that makes sense: By drinking alcohol that’s meant to be green.

Of course, we’re talking about absinthe. Long clouded in myth (no, it doesn’t cause hallucinations), the wormwood-laced spirit is enjoying its tenth anniversary of being re-legalized in the United States. We thought we’d celebrate by giving you a roundup of ten favorite absinthes, chosen for flavor, name, and/or because the bottle looks cool (don’t you dare pretend you’ve never chosen booze that way). There are many ways to drink absinthe (aficionados will tell you that lighting it on fire will ruin the flavor, but we’ll leave that decision up to you), so we’ve included our favorite methods below. Drink responsibly. Or don’t, we suppose. We’re not your mom.

Mansinthe Extrait d’Absinthe Suisse

Mansinthe
Photo by vaporvixen

This is Marilyn Manson’s absinthe, blended by Matter Spirits. Manson was involved in the creation of both the drink and the bottle’s artwork. Far from a half-assed celebrity collaboration, Mansinthe receives consistently decent ratings from absinthe newbies and connoisseurs alike.

Country of origin: Switzerland
Alcohol content: 66.6%. Of course.
How to enjoy it: Drink while wearing smeared black lipstick and your favorite Mechanical Animals tee, covered in sweat from a night of dancing, or on a quiet Wednesday night while you rewatch Jawbreaker just for Manson’s cameo. Mansinthe//$60

Doc Herson’s “Green” Absinthe Verte

Doc Herson Absinthe
Photo by dewinespot

Created by an actual doctor (of chiropractic), this artisanal absinthe arrives in a hand-sealed, hand-labeled bottle that looks straight out of an antique pharmacist’s cupboard. It’s actually distilled in New York, and the recipe uses New York tap water (as well as a mystical concoction of botanicals).

Country of origin: United States (New York)
Alcohol content: 66%
How to enjoy it: On a warm spring night, under the moon, on the veranda (if you don’t have one, substitute a fire escape or porch steps). Share with your coven if you feel like inviting them over. Doc Herson’s “Green” Absinthe Verde//$40

Absinthe Bizarre

Absinthe Bizarre
Photo by Absinthes.com

Created in a collaboration between Cabaret Bizarre and distiller Jean-Jacques Charrère, there’s not a lot of this absinthe to go around. If you want to try it, snap up a bottle before the limited quantities are gone.

Country of origin: Switzerland
Alcohol content: 60%
How to enjoy it: Naked, smeared in oil paints, making strange art while blasting vintage accordion music. Absinthe Bizarre//$71

Absinthe Exitus

Absinthe Exitus
Photo by Absinthes.com

Housed in a tall, slick bottle with an aggressive logo, this green lady’s got one of the highest alcohol contents of any on our list. It’s unsweetened, so feel free to do the whole sugar-cube-slotted-spoon bit with it.

Country of origin: Germany
Alcohol content: 89.9%
How to enjoy it: In moderation, lest the strength of it strip you of your remaining modesty. Absinthe Exitus//$35

Brevans H.R. Giger Absinthe

Brevans H.R. Giger Absinthe
Photo by I Heart Absinthe

The bottle art is Giger, but (thankfully) the taste isn’t. Herbal and creamy, this Matter Distillery absinthe will look lovely in your house even if you don’t partake.

Country of origin: Switzerland
Alcohol content: 68%
How to enjoy it: Crack open a bottle for your Alien movie marathon night. Sorry, we can’t advise on whether to pair this absinthe with popcorn or nachos, so you’re on your own there. Brevans H.R. Giger Absinthe//$71

Absinthe Blending Kit

Absinthe Blending Kit
Photo by Absinthe Online

This kit is for mixologists who want to shake hands with the green fairy. It contains a nice range of distillates, recipes (including one for a Montpelier-style brew), and is a lovely set for those who want to experiment with creating drinks tailored to their tastes. Looks great on a curio shelf, too.

Country of origin: England
Alcohol content: 60%
How to enjoy it: In the alchemical basement laboratory that you just KNEW you needed to build. Absinthe Blending Kit//$92

Adnams Verte Absinthe

Adnams Absinthe Verde
Photo by Adnams

Adnams Southwold’s dapper as fuck bottle wouldn’t look out of place in Garbo’s liquor cabinet, and the rich spirit gets its peridot hue from natural colorings rather than the Blue #1/Yellow #5 that some other companies use.

Country of origin: England
Alcohol content: 66%
How to enjoy it: Drink it neat while playing poker with the Devil. Remember, hold your cards close to your chest, keep your bluffing face on, and never bet on an inside straight. Adnams Verte Absinthe//$46

Antitoxin Absinthe

Antitoxin Absinthe
Photo by absinthes.com

Step aside, Crystal Head Vodka. The distillery created this absinthe with an 89.9% alcohol content (tying for strongest brew on our list), so bottling it in a glass skull seems only fitting.

Country of origin: Austria
Alcohol content: 80%
How to enjoy it: Best drunk from a skull. If you don’t have one lying about, straight from the bottle will do. To get the most from this drink, ask one of your undead skeleton legion to bring you seconds while you sit atop your hoard of enemy skulls in your secret lair on Skull Mountain. Skulls. Absinthe Antitoxin//$41

Vieux Carré Absinthe

Photo by thegreenhoursociety

This macerated absinthe’s got the classiest bottle on our list. It’s said to have a complex flavor, which isn’t surprising when you see the list of herbs used to create it. The distillery offers several cocktail recipes, including one called “Absinthe Wakes the Heart Grow Fonder” that includes coffee and chocolate syrup. +1 for caffeine, +1 for terrible puns.

Country of origin: United States (Philadelphia)
Alcohol content: 60%
How to enjoy it: Sip a glass while stretched across a chaise longue in your favorite emerald silk robe. Share with the maid. Get up to mischief. Vieux Carre Absinthe Superieure//$56

Absinthe Gothica

Absinthe Gothica
Photo by Alandia

Guys, guys! They named one after us!

This isn’t a green (verde) absinthe, but instead pours out a deliciously dark purple-black. Created with a nontraditional recipe that provides interesting flavors (including cloves and roses), this liquor looks gimmicky with its “Essence of Darkness” label– but it packs a solid punch.

Country of origin: Austria
Alcohol content: 80%
How to enjoy it: Anything worth doing is worth overdoing. Pour this out in a cemetery at midnight, dressed in your finest winklepickers and velvet cloak, while reading Keats aloud to the full moon. Absinthe Gothica//$55

Featured image credit: The Daily Beast.

Alex MoeHagen

Alex MoeHagen

Alex Moehagen is an artist and author who lives with her pet Yeti in the frozen Northern Wastes. You can see her work on her website, Fox Bones, or follow her adventures on YouTube.

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